A Useless Book is a laugh-out-loud rhyming picture book for kids who love silliness, randomness, and a bit of mischief. It pretends to have zero educational value - proudly claiming to teach nothing at all - yet sneaks in real facts about animals, numbers, and the world around us. With Seuss-style humor and playful rhymes, it's the perfect gift for curious minds who learn best when they're laughing.

Made-up reviews (for fun): -

"The only thing I learned was how fast I can close a book."

• Readers Indigestion Digest

"My chair enjoyed it more than I did."

• Better Homes & Bookends

"Read it cover to cover. Still don't know how many humps a camel has."

• The Zoological Missed-it Monthly

"My kid started giggling. Now he thinks ignorance is funny. Thanks a lot."

• Parenting Panic Quarterly

"Even the goldfish seemed unimpressed."

• Aquatic Book Review & Snacks

"Great for leveling a table. Useless for leveling up your brain."

• IQ Not Included

"A triumph of nonsense. If nonsense had never triumphed."

• The London Foghorn

"This book taught me nothing, and now I proudly know even less."

• Forgetful & Free Newsletter

"If I could unread it, I would. Twice."

• Amnesia Weekly